Social Development of Gifted Children

**pdxmom** · 03-13-2004, 01:44 AM

Hello,

This is my first post. I am a parent, so I hope that you don't mind my posting. I've scoured the internet for good forums in regard to the development of gifted children, but just can't seem to find any.

I have a 7yrold son who is highly gifted. He is in his first year of public school. We have put him in third grade, yet still his intellectual ability is far beyond his third grade classmates. On the otherhand socially he is not quite at there level. He is doing well in class - no problems with behaviour or disruption.

The problem is that he doesn't seem to fit in. Many of the kids that he played with at the start of the year seem to be ignoring him now. He is really a sweet kid, but I must confess that in the eyes of his peers his behavior can be quite nerdy. He is 7 - most of them are 9. So, on the one hand he "dorks out" like a 7 year old, while also telling jokes that are beyond the intellectual level of his friends.

I fear that the rejection is making him lonely and not good for his self esteem. He seems rather tense and on the verge of tears. I try to talk to him about it, but he is reluctant to discuss it.

Can anyone give me any advise as to how I can handle this situation to help my son?

**Kelley_the_Gardener** · 03-14-2004, 04:03 PM

Your son sounds like a pretty typical gifted kid to me, with a pretty typical problem.

I don't know what state you are in, or what that state's laws/requirements are for the service of the gifted. My state recognizes social/emotional needs. And I have an extra certificate in gifted education from UCSanDiego. My experience is that the academic needs are much easier to meet than the social/emotional needs. And it's vital that we meet those more difficult needs; gifted people will continue to face "not fitting in" as adults, throughout their lifetimes.

One way that works well is to cluster the gifted kids together in the same class. This allows them to interact with kids who are more like themselves, and to feel less isolated and "different." I've taught this way very successfully. Clustered classes often meet with opposition from administrators and teachers; they think it puts all of those "high test-scorers" in one classroom and makes one teacher look better than the rest. Nothing could be further from the truth; many gifted kids don't score well, and don't excel academically because those social/emotional needs have gone unmet!

The first thing for you to do is find out what your state requires in the way of service. The next thing to do is become an advocate at your school site, with your teacher and your administrator, for your son. Then find some other outlets, outside of school for his interests and for his social needs. These kids are out there; look for parent support groups, clubs, etc.

See if your state has organizations for gifted education, and if those organizations include parents. My state has a couple:

CAG

[url="http://www.cagifted.org/"]http://www.cagifted.org/[/url]

CAG is a segment of the national group

[url="http://www.nagc.org/"]http://www.nagc.org/[/url]

and PAGE (Parents for the Advancement of Gifted Education) which I don't have a weblink for.

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